We were very torn between moving forward with the public school she's unhappy at or switching her to the state Deaf School. We talked to many people...including Brooklyn. We have reached a decision (thank goodness).
Brooklyn's problems seem to be social. Yes a few issues can be pointed to her deafness, but most of all, it's her reactions and interactions with the other kids. Honestly, the kids don't care that she wears implants. It's just part of her. However, if Brook is upset because she doesn't always understand people the first time, removing her and placing her in a school FULL of signing children, would only enhance her frustrations. She is interested in sign. We will get her some Signing Times videos. It's not as if she's missing part of herself by not signing. It appears to be a fun 'hobby' and if she wants to learn an additional language, that's awesome at this point.
We have decided she needs to be more social outside of school. I thought I was doing everyone a favor by skipping b'day parties, skipping church, skipping sports because of my fear she would not behave properly. So, I've taken a loooong look at our behavior-which can seem anti-social to the kids, since we work, and go home. We have decided to enroll her as a cheerleader this year, if she don't change her mind. And we are getting more involved with our community. She and I already had an awesome time volunteering to make first aid bags for storm relief workers last week. There were tons of kids there and she did great! She got a sweet note from a little girl in her class that told her how much she loved her and combined with a strong effort on her part as well....she had an awesome week at school. She had confidence, she felt better, she wanted to go...
And how could I remove her from a place that has taught her this...
I mean-this is FIRST GRADE. She is doing awesome and we are proud to say that we have decided to keep her where she is at. She will learn new coping skills, work on her interaction with others and I do believe she will have a great Second Grade year at her public school. We thank you all for your comments, emails and phone calls that have helped us realize-we could do her more harm than good by removing her from her current school. ((hugs))
8 comments:
Great decision !! Am sure she would learn to adapt and deal with situations around her.Empower her which I am sure you would.All the best!
One thing about raising kids with hearing loss is that there is truly no "right" answer for all of them. Each family has to make a well-informed decision regarding what is best for their own child.
I think you should rest easy tonight knowing that it's clear you've put a lot of thought and consideration into this decision. It sounds like you're getting her on the right path for success.
Do you guys have Skype? CJ is in 1st grade and would love to have a friend like him to Skype with.
One thing that really bother me. Cochlear implant users and deafhood is no difference, they both are the same in shoe however, they cannot work for police, security guard, firefighter, army, navy, lawyer, justice, politician, doctors, and you name it, coz they do not hire who ci users same as deafhood. Cochlear implant labelled to be a deafness as well as deafhood. Cochlear implants is a must for thier hearing parents's sake for the communication, such speak (talk) and hear a thing like the music, nothing more. I do researched and wondered but cochlear implant is nothing to find more important, otherwise, the only for a speak (talk) and hear a thing... I not against ci, but I do have friends who's ci users, which I respect them as well, therefore, they told me ci is not worth it beacuse there is too many issues same as deafhood problems such frustration to find the jobs, too many negative such like the people will notice ci on the skull to identity them a deafness, unlike deafhood to hard identity coz look so normal due none ci machine on the skull... so anyway, my point cochlear implants is completely failure... But just for hositpal and doctors profits... no hard feeling... :)
Deaf with cochlear implants or without, it is a shame, Anonymous, that you focus on what deaf people can't do. There are deaf people doing all of those things.
Just remember, you are hearing. They are deaf and trying find their place. Don't let anyone brush it off just because people say they don't care she is deaf and wear an implant, nothing is more hurtful than people being denial or try hard to make her deafness more "invisible" than it is as if it an elephant in the room. I could communicate just fine with kids in my public school using speechreading skills (otherwise I would not manage to stay there from k-12th as the only deaf..btw I did have a deaf oral only sister but we do not talk at all. Your kids will not have their implant all the time so they need to learn to communicate each other anyhow if you want them to look after each other)
Hearing people well, they just can't relate to you and it is almost forbidden to talk about deaf issues with them. They stay so quiet about it or tell them they are being silly . Only other deaf see me as equal and appreciate me as I am and not broken version of hearing person. With hearing friends, sometimes I feel if I don’t come to them, they would forget me and not care rather I leave or stay while they call up their hearing friend and say "where were you? " ,"We miss you" "please come!PLEASE"
I hope she can work out with her school and classmates but keep in mind what I wrote. It's could be an identity issues as well as social.
i gotta learn to keep up w/ you girl. your B is AWESOME...adorable. always decisions to be made eh? once you make the decision, it is so much easier isn't it?!! I know you make your decisions w/ prayer and thought..so you can't go wrong :)
To the other anonymous...
I teach deaf/hh students (with and without CIs) and we talk about their deafness all the time. They are valued and accepted by hearing and deaf peers. Yes, social skills is a common struggle for deaf/hh kids, but you see that across communication methods. And even if you don't have a CI on your head or a hearing aid behind your ear, I'll bet your "deafhood" becomes apparent when you communicate. It's not about hiding things. It's about doing what's right for each individual. It looks like Val and Brook are finding their path.
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